The day God showed me how dirty I really am. I cried and I loved. The day started when we got to a care point and our contact asked for 4 volunteers to help sort shoes in a storage tank. I ended up doing it and it was miserably beautiful. We all were continually sneezing, but we got to sort out shoes that would be distributed to the kids the rest of my team was playing with. Totally worth even minute of discomfort. After that we went another care point. This was so incredible! I got off the bus and was immediately being bombarded with little arms begging to be held. My heart broke open with an intensity to love. About 10 minutes after arriving kids were pulling out old bowls. It was time to eat. I sat down and waites. Soon I was sitting with 3 young boys and a little girl. One boy, who was probably One and a half, a a running around in nothing but a t-shirt. So he was affectionately deemed the naked cowboy. Later on I went to sit in the shade because it had gotten a little hot. The Naked Cowboy came over and wanted to be held… I knew it was coming. I tried to ignore his plea. I mean come on, he was naked baby and I was exhausted and did not want pee all over me. Then God spoke to me. He said “who are you to deny him? You come to me this way all the time.” I just pulled the naked cowboy into my lap right then. God totally showed me how gross, and dirty, and untouchable I am. I come to him broken, bare, and with nothing. Not once has He ever turned me away because I am missing something that makes me desirable. To God I am worth it all and I am beautiful. I spent the rest of the day with the naked cowboy’s hand wrapped around my finger. It has been a constant reminder for God’s unconditional love for my broken self.
