My whole life I thought of missions as a beautiful, life-changing experience, but that’s not always the case. I came on this trip filled with hatred, regret, and sadness. I expected that God called me on this trip to fix other people’s brokenness, but instead he made mine a priority. I have unknowingly been angry with God about things I didn’t even know about for a very long time. But what he is teaching me on this trip is that it’s okay to be messy and broken. God can, and will handle your anger for as long as he needs to. He wants us as humans to know that it’s okay to go through the motions, it’s okay to be a Christian and also be a broken person at the same time. He will love you in the good and bad. Brokenness seems to be the theme for this trip, and it’s actually a beautiful thing. Knowing that God still loves you when you may not even love yourself is so mind blowing. He loves us so much that he’ll wait for us when we turn against him because he understands our pain and knows our true hearts. This trip has made me see God in a new way. I truly see him as my Father, and I’m now ready to run into his arms and come home. It’s always a good reminder to know that it’s okay to be messy and to know that God can handle your anger. “Learn to fully embrace your brokenness so God can fully put you back together.”
Written by: Courtney
