Peace, by Abby Bender
The last few days have been so incredible and it is so evident how God hand-picked this team to do amazing things.
A few days ago, James said “I feel like God is breaking down everything I thought I was and building me back up into someone new.” Anyone at home would probably tell you I am talkative, outgoing, and that I always have an opinion to share. Here, that has not been me. I have been described as the “quiet one”. I noticed the change in me and was aware that I was not as talkative as I normally am, and it bothered me until I figured out why.
At home I am someone people depend on. I am the big sister who always tries to be a good role model, I am the walking calendar, I am the friend that can always be counted on, I am a lot of things to a lot of people and as much as I love being involved, it can be stressful. I’m constantly part of some conversation or planning some event, and I take on the responsibility of being someone that others can depend on. I love that and love being involved in things but since training camp started I noticed that I did not need to be in control here. I am so used to giving advice but my beautiful teammates are such amazing speakers that I am content to just sit and listen to them speak. I am used to planning my days and making sure I always know what’s happening, but we’ve been blessed with amazing leaders that are taking care of everything for us. These people inspire me and I am so blessed to be here with them.
Life has been hectic recently and honestly, I felt like I had to be in control to be effective. Jesus is teaching me to be still and it’s a beautiful truth. I’ve been filled with the Holy Spirit and I’m receiving so much joy and peace from diving deeper into a relationship with my Savior. If someone would have told me a few weeks ago that I would be the quiet one AND that I would be totally okay with it, I would’ve laughed. But God is breaking down who I thought I needed to be and making me something different. He is giving me peace with things I have struggled with for a long time and is teaching me the beauty in being still and trusting Him. Jesus doesn’t ask us to be super busy or do a lot of big things. He asks us to love Him, trust Him fully, and praise His name and that is exactly what we’re doing.
PS: Today we met a native tribe and got to dance with them AND we got to cuddle monkeys!! How great is our God!!
